


A Piece of You

by dokidokidk



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - College/University, M/M, implied wonwoo x junhui, this is kinda sad but also not sad at the same time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-05
Updated: 2017-09-05
Packaged: 2018-12-22 13:19:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11968227
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dokidokidk/pseuds/dokidokidk
Summary: It has been a year yet nothing about Soonyoung's feelings has really changed.





	A Piece of You

**Author's Note:**

  * For [seokkwan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/seokkwan/gifts).



> Prompt: it's the summer after our first year off at different universities and i really thought aft all this time i'd be over you, but just the sight of your car in your parents' driveway makes it feel like no time has passed
> 
> I don't think this is long enough to be considered a proper slow burn but I had lots of fun with the prompts anyway haha
> 
> Shout out to [delight](http://archiveofourown.org/users/delight) for betaing this one ♡

 

  _02.40 PM Hyung, I am going home today_

_02.41 PM Can we meet?_

Soonyoung goes faster when he passes his house on his way home from work. The sound of rusty chain crackling unhappily when he pedals harder does a good job at distracting him from that black VW beetle parked neatly in his driveway.

It has been a year since the last he saw the exact same car parked in that driveway, unusual and new and shiny. He still doesn’t like it, just as much as the very first day he saw that car.

It’s not the car’s fault, but he still has the need to blame something on why he left the town.

-sksn-

_11.02 PM Summer break?_

_11.07 PM Where do you want to meet?_

“So your boyfriend is coming back home.”

Soonyoung’s steps halts at the glass door. He spares a glance at the guy standing by at the cashier before walking away while taking off his old varsity jacket. News travels fast in such a small town. “He is not my boyfriend.”

Wonwoo smiled knowingly, “You wish he was.”

 -sksn-

_06.06 AM Yeah. My sister wants me to drive her around today_

_06.06 AM Lunch tomorrow? Pick a place, I want some ice cream_

“You’re pining like some kind of trashy romantic novel main character.”

Soonyoung automatically puts the chips on his hand in the aisle, ignoring his company’s sarcastic jab from the front of the room. He looks fondly at the illuminated screen in his other hand before locking his phone and pocketing it safely in his jeans, “Like you aren’t pining yourself.”

Wonwoo finishes the last line of a hànzì character on his notebook, “At least I am making effort to know him better.”

He chuckles, “Learning a whole new language simply to impress your new neighbor who speaks perfectly fine Korean seems a bit too much, don’t you think?”

“I want to know what Wen Junhui keeps on muttering under his breath when he’s around me,” Wonwoo’s annoyance is apparent in his tone. “He does a shitty job at being subtle about it.”

The amount of secret glances the new guy steals at Wonwoo whenever he goes to their store is ridiculous. Soonyoung is tempted to tell the truth, “You’d be surprised.”

  -sksn-

_08.15 AM There is this new place that sells amazing parfait a block away from my part time place_

_08.16 AM My break is around 12.30_

“Hey.”

Soonyoung looks up when he sits down right in front of him. Red and black plaid shirt left open over a thin black shirt. He has his sleeves rolled up messily halfway through his forearm, there is a mark left behind from a watch on his right wrist, slighter lighter and visible on his sun kissed skin.

“It’s been a while.”

Seokmin’s hair is definitely longer now, his black messy mop is so different from the clean undercut he had when he left. There are prominent dark bags under his eyes; it’s obvious that college has taken its toll on his body. He changed his glasses too; those thin rimmed glasses perched on his perfect nose used to have much sharper edges. Other than those, the messy style and the way he is looking hungrily at Soonyoung’s half eaten parfait still feel familiar enough.

Soonyoung pushes his glass to the younger, urging him to take a bite. Seokmin takes a spoonful before trying to eat it all in one go. He hums happily, the small thin spoon still stuck between his lips.

It has been a year and nothing about him has really changed.

“How are you Seokmin?”

   -sksn-

_09.00 PM I still can’t get over that parfait_

_09.01 PM How did you find that place again?_

Soonyoung sits next to the open window in his room, feeling the warm breeze of summer wind hitting his face softly from time to time. His phone perched precariously on the windowsill, beeping quietly as the chats keep on coming through.

_09.02 PM Migyu dragged me there the other day; he didn’t want to try it alone_

_09.02 PM Remember him?_

Soonyoung was there a little too late and Seokmin was there a little too soon. He still thinks they somehow ended up being classmates for three whole years during high school as a blessing. He remembers they were jumping from one club to another during their first year before settling down on dance and band. Those after school practices full of loud laughs and sweats that lasted longer and longer because it seemed like they just couldn’t get enough of one another.

He has never met anyone who clicks with himself so perfectly like Seokmin does, and he can’t help but be selfish and hoard the sun all to himself.

_09.02 PM Of course I remember our bassist hyung_

_09.03 PM How is he now?_

They and their silly little rock band that dreamt so big. Us against the world until high school was over and ruined everything. They left as good memories nonetheless.

Now it’s about Seokmin and his new world that Soonyoung can’t touch. He talked about being recruited by a new band with a small smile on his face, talked about joining a dance crew too. The way he said nobody there can compare with Soonyoung’s dance skill, proud seeping through his tone as he excitedly explained everything.

Words that left him feeling warm and tingly, pumping his heart just a little bit faster and unconsciously tugging up the corner of his lips as the time went.

_09.07 PM He is helping his dad in their garage now_

_09.07 PM A lot of things has changed Seokmin_

It has been a year yet nothing about his feelings has really changed.

This is stupid.

  -sksn-

_10.10 PM I want to swim!_

The leather feels sticky against his nape and Soonyoung tries his hardest not to fidget too often.

“Do you smoke now Seokmin?”

“What? No!” Seokmin laughs, a familiar melody he didn’t know he was missing until he heard it again, “My roommate does occasionally, He’s majoring in mechanical engineering too so he rides a lot with me.”

Soonyoung runs his hand on the seatbelt strapped on his chest as he takes a deep breath, sensing the faint smell of tobacco in the air. Seokmin teases him from the driver seat, “I won’t risk on you hating me because I smoke you know.”

“I really hate the smell.”

“Of course you do.”

Soonyoung stares at the dashboard in reverie. His eyes are slowly moving to the side where Seokmin’s fingers, his long and pretty fingers, wrapped loosely around the black steering wheel. The same fingers thrumming around guitar strings playfully months ago. The same fingers that keep appearing in his imagination over and over, where they gently touch his lips or rub comforting circles on his naked skin.

“I don’t want you to hurt your throat again.”

“Yeah,” Seokmin answers him softly. Soonyoung can see the delicate wrinkles marring the corner his eyes as he smiles from the side, “I know.”

He didn’t intend to bring back a bittersweet memory but he can feel Seokmin is thinking about it too.

It started when they saw the audition banner, bright and inviting and placed right in front of the Pledis building that they always passed on their way home from school every single day. Seokmin joked about being a main vocal and Soonyoung joked back about his childhood dream as a choreographer. It was an easy afternoon and they both thought nothing about it at all after. The school was buzzing with the news when he went there the next day however. Supposed it was expected considering they were attending performing arts high school and all.

At first he was just going with the flow, going to studios and practicing until late with the others, never intended to actually do the audition. Seokmin was there too, laughing and easily tutoring their friends’ vocals with that wonderful voice of his. He doesn’t remember when exactly but that audition had become an obsession. Maybe it was the whispers that said he and Seokmin were the best around, and that they would easily pass the audition and overcome the challenge everyone’s was eager to try. Soonyoung has always been weak for challenges.

And as simple as that, suddenly being an idol trainee and debut was a life he wanted for himself.

He remembers practicing until his ankles bruised, day after day until every single muscle in his body ached. He knew himself well enough that once he got an obsession, he wouldn’t stop until his body break. He remembers Seokmin singing tunes to the tracks they used, recreating harmony alongside with him as they danced their shoes to nothing. Soonyoung had become so used to his heavy breaths reverberating right next to him.

There were times where they were too tired to care anymore, too tired to go back and staying still in that cheap studio they rented when everybody else had already gone home. He remembered lying side by side with Seokmin and complaining about how everything hurt, listening to his quiet laugh answering him and be content with silent after. Soonyoung remembers feeling so exhausted that he had to force his body to turn to the side so he could look at the younger a little better, watching his chest steadily rose up and down. He remembers thinking, suddenly, of how much he didn’t want this for Seokmin, he deserved so much more than a life of constant repetition and training and not knowing if they could actually pass and debut.

The sudden guilt that overwhelmed him when he realized that maybe it was _his_ stupid decision that dragged Seokmin down to this madness.

“I can do this,” He said, with his voice so strained when Soonyoung quietly said that he wanted them to stop, “You are doing great too,” He was looking at Soonyoung with so much desperation and he remembered how bad that look _hurt_ his heart, “We can do this.”

So he smiled and said that he was okay too. Said he felt amazing and ready to go despite his head was screaming for him to stop, screaming that this was unhealthy for both of them. It didn’t even matter what he wanted anymore, he had no power to say no to those pleading eyes. The only important thing was Seokmin wanted it for them and he would do anything for Seokmin.

Two souls lied to one another for the sake of each other happiness.

“Thank you hyung.”

“For what?” Soonyoung unconsciously squints his eyes as they drive closer to the beach. The sunlight is attacking as soon as they left the middle of the town where there are still some tall building shielding them. Hopefully Seokmin didn’t forget to bring his sunglasses and complains a lot like how he used to before.

“For following my impulsive request,” Seokmin flips the visor down and before continues, “I miss you.”

Soonyoung’s answer dies down in his throat when he swallows.

  -sksn-

_09.57 AM I think we have screwdrivers at the store_

_09.58 AM You might need to do some searching though_

“Hey!”

Soonyoung grins as he walks into the store, clad in white dark blue shirt with an old band logo printed on the front, glasses slipping low on the bridge of his nose, “It’s at the back.”

“I still can’t believe dad managed to lose something as crucial as that,” Seokmin drops a clear tumbler in front of him. He can clearly see red strawberry juice inside, “Mum made you something.”

Soonyoung takes a sip slowly. He _misses_ this, this sweet attention he always got whenever he went to Seokmin’s house, “Tell her she’s the best Seokmin.”

The younger nods as he walks away from the cashier. Soonyoung can hear him singing to the song playing on the radio as he goes.

Seokmin was supposed to be Pledis new boyband main vocalist.

Soonyoung watches Seokmin from the corner of his eyes; he is squatting down to pick on something on the bottom row of the aisle. He has grown so much within a year, his broad shoulder is all filled up and there is something new and different with the way he behaves now. A certain maturity that follows his much slower steps, like he fully knows what he wants in life and how to get it now, so different than the awkward guy Soonyoung knew back in high school.

The guy who looked at him every time he made a joke, waited patiently for his approval. The guy who immediately grinned before making more silly jokes when Soonyoung looked at him and laughed along. The guy Soonyoung has been desperately falling in love with for in the last two years.

He has grown up to be one of the most attractive men Soonyoung has ever seen in his life. Seokmin deserves to stand on stage and share his beautiful voice to the world, to be loved and adored by thousands of people for who he is.

Seokmin was supposed to be Pledis new boyband main vocalist, but he didn’t take his chance.

The news about the only two people managed to pass the audition spread of course, fast and quiet like the cold wind of winter. A handsome senior with pale pretty skin and red pouty lips and someone else from his year with voice strong enough to shake Pledis’ scout PD in the first try. Nobody could pin a name to the second one but Seokmin was one of the popular choices. Nobody could beat him before and it only made sense if nobody could beat him after too.

Soonyoung pretty sure Seokmin knew he knew about this. The younger never said anything, so he didn’t either.

Maybe he didn’t say anything because of jealousy; Soonyoung didn’t say anything because he didn’t want to ruin his own fantasy of his so called _best-friend_ that was still on the same level as him. Maybe he didn’t say anything because he liked it, liked the days after the audition that they spent on the fast food restaurant a few building away from their school, telling one another about how Pledis was missing real talents over vanilla milkshakes.

He kept quiet too, about a certain thing ricocheting in his thought ever since; Seokmin did it for him.

What a comforting lie.

It was around the time he began to _really_ notice Seokmin, noticing the proud smile he gave when Soonyoung aced the new dance routine they all pitched in during their club activity, noticing the familiar warmth of his arm against his when they went to watch movie together, noticing how his sharp features went all soft as he leaned awkwardly on his shoulder, falling asleep on Soonyoung’s couch during their supposed to be all night gaming sleepover.

Noticing just how soft his lips looked and how much he wanted to kiss them silly.

Wanting to kiss, wanting to own, wanting the world to know that Seokmin belongs to him.

Seokmin is the only person he has ever wanted this badly.

“Did you find what you are looking for, Seokmin?”

Soonyoung always thought that he had the chance, from the way Seokmin’s eyes lingered hot on his body when he danced or from how eager he was to touch, so he took his sweet time and waited. He never expected just how busy the last year of high school went, just how fast Seokmin slipped away from his life.

The bubbling regret on why he didn’t say anything when Seokmin quietly told him that he had to move out of town and live alone for college.

“Yep,” Seokmin walks back to the cashier with orange screwdriver in hand, “Ring me up?”

“It’s on the house,” Soonyoung raises his half-drunk juice and grins when the younger laughs at him, “I’ll drop this at your home when my shift is over.”

“Thanks hyung,” Seokmin smiles brightly and slips it in his back pocket, “See you around.”

“Yeah,” Soonyoung grins widens when Seokmin waves exaggeratingly before he walks out the store, “Definitely.”

There’s this horrible feelings he gets when walking around the town and seeing the places Seokmin and him used to go, anxiously thinking thousands of scenarios about Seokmin might go there to with _someone else._  The paranoia Soonyoung feels whenever he listens to the younger talking about his new life over phone calls. 

The ugly pain from jealousy that always shows up no matter how many times he tells himself that Seokmin is _not his._

Maybe it’s his punishment for lying to the sun.

  -sksn-

It comes as easy as breathing.

Seokmin is sitting next to him, hands on the striped beach towel to support his own weight. He is talking about something they’ll probably forget by the time they go home. Soonyoung is facing him, leaning forward just to be a little closer.

“It’s our third? Fourth?”

“Fifth this time,” Soonyoung rolls his eyes in disbelief, “You’ve been dragging me here since last week.”

Seokmin looks at him and laughs, “I didn’t hear you complaining.”

“There’s nothing to complain about.”

“Ah hyung,” The way he sounds so spoiled still makes Soonyoung want to smile no matter how many times, “I love you too.”

“One of these days,” He sighs. Seokmin said it _too often,_ and Soonyoung’s stupid heart still beats like crazy everytime he does, “I am going to take you seriously.”

Seokmin breathes out slowly before whispering, “You should.”

Soonyoung can see the faint blush marring the younger’s cheeks.

_Oh._

Seokmin tries to look away, “I-“

“No, you’re right,” Soonyoung leans closer and kisses him, he can feel dry lips against his own for just a moment before the other pulls away, “I should.”

 _So that’s how his lips feel_.

Seokmin positively beams and Soonyoung can feels himself unconsciously mimicking him. That smile makes him feels like everything in his life is suddenly all better.

The hand holding the back of his head is gentle. Seokmin is looking at him with a silent question in his eyes before he tilts his head and kisses him again. Soonyoung _melts_ , letting himself drown in the innocent thrill the other is offering. Feeling the lips touching his own over and over, feeling Seokmin’s fingers tangling in his hair, feeling every inch of his damp palm creeping down on his arm, grasping his and awkwardly interlacing their fingers together.

When Seokmin leans back and laughs breathlessly, Soonyoung wonders how he missed the adoration coloring his eyes all these years. Seokmin is looking at him like he is the center of the world, with his bashful gaze and the slight quirk at the corner of his lips. He tries to say something, mouth opens and closes before he laughs again. He looks so happy like that _,_ with his eyes closed prettily and his smile so wide like it’s his personal job to outshine the sun.

Soonyoung wonders if he has done enough to earn the way _his world_ is looking at him like that.

“Thank you.”

There are so many things he hasn’t said, so many feelings he didn’t dare tell.

Seokmin deserves better. He deserves so much more.

Once upon a time, the world falls in love with a lie.

  -sksn- 

Everything in the room screams ‘Seokmin!’ so loudly.

Weird discoloration on the wall from where he put posters before, the red drone perched dangerously close to the edge of the cupboard, white humidifier on the bedside table and Seokmin’s favorite navy blue hat laid next to it. Even the messily closed suitcase on the floor, green t-shirt he recognizes Seokmin used the day before laid forgotten on top.

Shoulders that feels so right under his palms, how his thighs tenses beneath his own, the lips that are slowly going down on his neck and leaving a thousand kisses.

His feverish touches leave Soonyoung feeling so lightheaded, like he’s drunk on happiness and something else.

Seokmin doesn’t seem to care about all that, too busy mapping the skin of Soonyoung’s back like it’s the last time he ever gets to do it.

He is mouthing words on his shoulder, “It’s hot.”

Soonyoung looks down slightly, feeling the end of the younger hair tickling his cheek, before gently cupping his face and looking at Seokmin properly, “I know.”

Seokmin runs his hand down his side, thumb brushing lightly on his ribcage. Thin fingers are playing with the rim of Soonyoung’s jeans, touching bare hip with big and warm palms. He tries and fails to look away, “I am scared.”

“We can always stop if you want to,” Soonyoung says softly, ignoring how painfully turned on he actually is. He drops his hands, dragging them slowly down his chest, and feels his body heat seeping through the thin shirt. It’s not fair how Seokmin still has some of his clothes on after everything that has happened. Soonyoung nuzzles Seokmin’s soft black mop closer and the smell of pine is calming him down a little it, “You know I am okay with that.”

He hugs him closer and Soonyoung braces himself by gripping the other’s shirt for balance. Seokmin leans down and rests his forehead on his shoulder, “You are so good to me hyung.”

He is mouthing words on his skin again. Something he is longing to hear for far too long.

Soonyoung takes a deep breath before slowly unclenching his fist on the other’s shirt. It’s the last night Seokmin in town and honestly, he doesn’t want to let go.

  -sksn-

Soonyoung greets softly to the one curled up next to him, “Good morning.”

Seokmin hums his answer and stretches his hand across his waist. Soonyoung chimes again when he opens his eyes blearily, “Wake up you big baby.”

“Too early,” Seokmin yawns widely before nuzzles closer, half hugging him too in the process,  “Why are you awake already anyway?”

Soonyoung decides to complain instead of answering, “You are sleeping on my hand.”

“Does it hurt?” Seokmin shifts away a little, just enough to get himself off the limb trapped between their bodies.

“Not really.”

“Good, cause I’m not going anywhere.”

“I will laugh when your mom barges in and catches us half naked just because you’re too lazy to wake up.”

“She would probably do that too really,” Seokmin yawns before continues, “Also, I locked the door.”

“You do remember you need to go back today right.”

“It can wait,” Seokmin uses his hand as a pillow and closes his eyes again, “You’re too warm and soft to let go.”

Soonyoung says nothing. He strokes the younger black strands gently and watches as the slight wrinkles on his forehead smoothens out. Their legs are tangling together and his left hand is still awkwardly trapped between their chests. Seokmin is laying a little bit lower than him and he can feel his body move with each breath he takes.

“Aren’t you tired?”

“Of what?”

“Playing with my hair,” Seokmin nudges his palm sleepily, “Feels so good though, don’t stop.”

“Now that you mention it.” Soonyoung draws his hand back.

Seokmin sighs and kisses the exposed shoulder, “I am going to miss you.”

“You can always call.”

“It’s not the same anymore,” He squeezes his palm on the other hip, “Now that I already know how it feels like to have you, I don’t feel like letting go.”

Soonyoung clicks his tongue at the sudden possessiveness, “I didn’t say anything about letting go.”

“I can’t help it you know,” He traces the dipped line between Soonyoung’s ribs lightly one by one with his fingertips, “What if someone religiously comes to you and you realizes that you like them more than me?”

“Unlike you Seokmin, I am not that likeable.”

“Do you know how hard it is to _not_ like you? I’ve seen girls back in high school gushing about you, about how hard working and cool and dreamy you were and how jealous they were of me,” Seokmin chuckles humorlessly, “Like I didn’t feel all of that personally.”

Soonyoung scrunches up his eyebrows in confusion, “High school?”

“Yeah,” Seokmin opens his eyes, “High school.”

The realization hits him hard like a truck.

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

“I don’t want to risk ruining something we had back then, I don’t know,” Seokmin looks up and frowns, “It’s stupid.”

“It’s not.”

“I did something horrible just because I wanted to have more time to be with you, I _lied_ to you hyung.”

“We do stupid things to keep what we want,” When his lips curls into a soft smile Soonyoung knows that he understands already. They don’t need to talk about things they both did or didn’t do, it’s passed and it’s okay.

“The only thing I regret is not knowing about how you feel earlier,” He sighs, “All I want is to stay here and promise you forever.”

It can’t happen, no matter how much they want it and not right now.

“I am willing to do anything to keep you by my side,” Seokmin leans closer laughs, “It’s silly, isn’t it?”

Soonyoung learns that loving someone is so much more than wanting to see him happy. Loving someone means wanting to be part of, to be _the cause_ of his happiness, and doing whatever it takes to make it stay. It’s more than just one grand moment, it’s doing every little thing that matters for Seokmin, slowly making everything about him a part of his world and Soonyoung’s in his. Being in love is about showing the world that Seokmin already belonged and how proud Soonyoung is of him, wanting to spend every moment together just because being with him alone is making him warm and content _._

“I love you.”

“Yeah,” Seokmin whispers the words on his skin, “I know.”

**Author's Note:**

> Leave a feedback :)


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